War is not healthy for fancy chickens and other living things.
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The top converter of measurements! Great for educational! Including: Acceleration, Angle, Area, Consumption, Currency, Data, Energy, Length, Mass, Pressure, Radioactivity, Temperature, Time, Torque, Velocity, Volume.
Did you know that a United Kingdom pint is only 13.32 American ounces? That certainly explains why UK beer is so much stronger. Did you know the British acre is a teensy bit smaller than the American acre? Likewise the British gallon? We begin to detect a pattern here. Perhaps this is the true explanation for the enmity between our two countries -- because size really does matter.
Yes, it's true. They were all just being polite.
MConvert provides an early warning of lurking danger in the form of a bizarro-world icon. We studied this cerulean monstrosity for some time before we realized that it was slowly, inexorably, driving us mad. We then turned our attention to the application itself and were relieved to find an ordinary-looking conversion table.
All went well during our first tentative conversions (area and volume) but when we got brave and selected torque conversion, the window suddenly skittered off the bottom of the screen like a squirrel with a guilty secret. We recovered from our fright by obsessively clicking the two unlabeled globular buttons whose only clear purpose is to make us think of breasts.
Big glowing robot breasts.
We also enjoyed the super-large-print readability of the developer's website, which provided this hot crispy nugget of misinformation: "All products are specially designed for 'normal' people." We beg to differ. MConvert is jam-packed with fruity conversions whose utility in the lives of "normal" people is decidedly sketchy. If the developer wishes to target normal Mac users, we suggest that future versions include:
For $20 (or 2,980 Nigerian Naira -- no thanks to MConvert's pedestrian currency conversion), we expect an application with a little more junk in its trunk. Intelligent Computer Products, you are straining the outer limits of our credulity. Take this limp handshake and convert it to a 9.8.
Not just another Ftp client! AbleFtp is designed with automation in mind, so you do not have to spend time interactively transferring files.
Oh yeah, did they mention that it's also designed to have atrociously vile user interface, with marvelously enormous windows? Apparently not.
Simple User Interface helps you transfer files interactively, but the Goal is to get you to create advanced ftp tasks that can be scheduled automatically or run manually.
Strangely, writing a small shell script is vastly more appealing after confronting this unnatural grotesquerie of java perversions. Although "Email Notification of task failure based on task exit code" is strangely tempting, the absolutely pathetic interface would tempt only a few of our more masochistic D&D-playing readers. Worse still, some of the buttons display objectionable animating graphics. May all the world's false idols strike down this interface offender before he codes any further.
HiTeksoftware, we suggest an aperient experience with a crate of bran before you take of the obvious step of deleting all your code and cleanly rewriting this parcel of soiled and knobby widgets. You may also automate your enjoyment of our 11.0 rating, reflecting the immense perfection of the sheer terrors that infest your characteristically ploppy spume. Perhaps too, "DisabledFTP" would be a more apt moniker for your vulgar future endeavors.
