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How many times have you sat on your dingo-fur upholstered Barcalounger (custom-made, of course) and thought, “Golly gee wilikers, I wish I had me a pair of some eyeballs to sit in my menubar and follow this here pointer around.”? Even if your answer is “negative 3”, this app cannot fail to amaze you with it’s crusty outer shell, yet delightfully creamy inner filling. Oh yes, you may be thinking, “Ho hum, another eyeball app”, but you’re so very very WRONG! Wrong like when Dan Rather prophetically predicted, “I think you would likelier see a hippopotamus run through this room than see George Bush appoint Ralph Nader to the Cabinet.”
As I type this review, my eyes are inexorably drawn to the menubar where Twitch is looking more frantic than a three-legged cat trying to bury shit on a frozen pond. If that kind of frantic shit-burying energy isn’t your cup of tea, never fear, the level of customization available here is hotter than a Laredo parking lot in August. Eyes can even be made to float around the desktop like freaky little ghost things with a fear of cursors. And who knew that eyeballs could even have a sexual orientation? Further, rather then simple allowing two or three settings for the aforementioned preference setting, Eyeballs will allow you to pick anything in between (Twitch is undecided whether to be bi or gay.) They’ll be doing back flips in Nashville over this.
At a paltry $10 (2,266.60 Hungarian Forint), Eyeballs is tight as the pages in a book.
Stick Software, since the distracting effect of a desperately twitching eyeball could be construed as a use, I bestow a middling 8.7 rating.
Posted by jan at February 15, 2003 12:30 PM | TrackBackThat's, what, $5 an eyeball? Damn! VALUE!
Posted by: Durf on February 16, 2003 09:23 PMDoes paying the registration fee somehow reveal what the sexuality slider actually does? If so, well . . . okay, I still wouldn't buy it.
Posted by: Shawn on February 16, 2003 09:53 PMFor those of us with really big monitors and a tendency to lose cursors, eyeball apps are very useful. It happens, I swear.
Posted by: on February 17, 2003 08:20 AMBest thing I've read in a while. literally crying.
Posted by: Alex on February 17, 2003 12:29 PMI havent laughed that hard since microsoft's gilrfriend mentioned just how many orgasms she's faked! (CARS)
Freekin lol dudes! Nice writing!
Posted by: Nate on February 17, 2003 06:02 PMHey! I like eyeballs! True, the sexual orientation slider doesn't do anything, but you can have up to five eyeballs! It's a carryover from the old unix x-windows days. And it gives my co-workers something to stare at, freak about, and comment on, thus avoiding them actually touching my computer. That's useful.
More useless is Measles by the same company. Cute, but bouncing measles that use more processor power than PhotoShop? Yow.
Posted by: Fringe on February 18, 2003 02:01 AMReminds me of Red Dwarf. *shrugs*
Posted by: White Fire on March 7, 2003 12:58 AMOne more final comment, the PDF describes how to make a piece of hardware, I guess technically you could call a PDF "Software" but it's intent was to encourage others to make "Hardware"
It's also just a rehash of the ancient demo program from NeWS and early X windows. From the xeyes manpage:
AUTHOR
Keith Packard, MIT X Consortium
Copied from the NeWS version written (apparantly) by Jeremy Huxtable as seen at SIGGRAPH '88
UNIX has had it for free for fifteen years!
Posted by: Monty on October 12, 2003 05:52 PMTHERE IS A FREEWARE VERSION OF A SIMILAR PROG FOR 0S 9, WHICH DOES COME IN HANDY WITH MULTIPLE MONITORS.
Posted by: ISEEUR12 on February 25, 2004 02:17 PMOK.
THIS IS ACTUALLY A USEFUL PROGRAM.
GET YOUR TINY DICK OUTTA YER HANDS.
STOP POPPING YOUR ZITS.
MOVEOUT FROM YOUR PARENTS HOUSE.
LAST POST MOTHER FUCKERS!!