Pirst Fost !!!!!

I have to say that was a little dissapointing and much like bad Pizza, even bad pizza is kinda good.

Please Kill me

I am not so sure this program deserves a 11.0 for It has potential (at least more potential then Mr. Previously Insane), But then again, maybe they do deserve an 11.0 because of the spelling mistakes in the generated text.

Final Excuse Pro generated come backs:

That Norm O.Tidwell is mischevously accusing me of poopy mouth!

That Norm O.Tidwell is the secret puppetmaster orchestrating poopy mouth!

Behold my prepared statement regarding poopy mouth... our Norm O. Tidwell fittingly assumed the oft-disputed presidency of Venuzela, exerting executive authority over our doomed shithouse!

Interesting. "Venuzela" sounds like the evil she-Venutian from a bad 1950s sci-fi movie.

Behold my prepared statement regarding the humiliation of "Final Excuse Pro" at the hand of my own tongue...

That "Bongo the Monkey", and his menacing arsenal of coconuts is responsible for both Xena & Venuzela!

Astroboy, (born on April 7, 2003).

On the face of it, it would seem that Naomi is correct. There are windows that you fill in that make no sense, an algorithm that isn't, and a result that is completely bogus.

I suppose that I could counter her argument by pointing out that, being so deplorably useless, it lends itself wonderfully to PvT review. This becomes sort of an Escher thing, since any perfect 11 is inherently useful, at least to a van Tol.

I like to eat poopies.

Hello all,

In the pursuit of Science, I decided to conduct an investigation and interview a neutral subject about PvT. I had him review the site and then offer his opinions. Here are some of his more interesting comments:

* "It seems that you all feed on each other."
* "It's quite a synergistic manure pile."
* "It seems that PvT has become a small commenting community (in which everyone is) somehow in on the hijinks."
* "The weirdness ante keeps being upped."
* "The comments are incomprehensible."
* "I also like to eat poopies."
* "It's all so bizzare (sic)."

So there you have it, folks -- the view of PvT from outside the maelstrom, a perspective I'm sure we all dearly wish we could recapture. For most of us, I imagine that these results will merely confirm what we all suspected: we are, in fact, weird.

Okay, I made up that next to last quote. But the rest are really really real, really. I swear! Would I lie to you?

I utterly refute the suggestion that I am now, or ever have been, weird. When I was a boy, it was perfectly natural to play backgammon with your naked grandmother. And what is a manservant for, if not to pour cocktails and polish human skulls? And if smoking parsley and wearing an Ecuadorean glockenspiel as a hat is a crime, then I am surely guilty as charged. But weird?

Reality check, please, Dr Science! Where are you from, you freak?

Belvedere, harness the iguanas! We're late for the soup-spoon festival again!

Dear Aussie Boy:

The place I am from is far, far away from any US Government nuclear facilities, and I am most certainly *not* involved in funneling uranium to Piglet Bob for subsequent nefarious no-goodness.

I hope this satisfactorily answers your question.

Dr. Science

Oh boss, I ain't gona harness anything. You always tell me what to do and I never get a say in anything. I am tired of you being the boss and me being the man servant thing. I liked you better when you were weird.

I have emotional needs too you know. You never give a thought to my needs. It is always about you! You have to be the star of the show by always making the cute comments just to get everybody to like you and I am stuck with all of your dirty work. "Belvedere, harness the iguanas! Belvedere! Please re-truss Grandma and put her back in the coolroom with the pork bellies." Why don't you just come out and say it, "Belvedere, wipe my ass!" Will that be one ply or two master? Would it kill you to just say thank you every once and a while? That is all I ask for boss. A little measly respect. I am not an animal, I am a human being!

Is my elephant man face really that noticeable...

Somehow I stumbled upon this place while I was out fetchin' water for Daddy. I might have expected to find Erin messin' around with that Ashley Longworth in the woods, but I never expected to find such a vile, non-Christian assortment of poopy mouthed dummy heads! How did y'all get into Walton country, anyway?

P-U! I downloaded this piece of %^&T# yesterday. (I expected it would be garbage, but I did it anyway!) I think I deleted it even faster than I did iBush.

Dear Left Field,

Your transmission was garbled. Could not decode "%^&T#" message fragment. Could you please transmit your message again without encryption.

BTW, Final Excuse Pro is the most god damn fucking wussy piece of shitware to be smeared across my desktop.

Tracker of abuse (ultra big huge),

In order to assess the software directly without being late thank you.

The method you, oh!

^_o

Is it just me, or does Baby Banger sound vaguely obscene?

To the brainless piece of knobcheese who insists on playing Belvedere: if you are going to be a gormless rip-off merchant, with the morals of a hungry raccoon and the intelligence of the combined Bush cabinet, please at least use Australian or British spellings. It's very hard to perpetrate the blatant theft of intellectual property without having the intellect to spell things as per the original.

Three weeks in the scorpion tank for you! (Or one day listening to the "With and Wisdom of George W." audiocassette series. Your choice.)

Damn! That was supposed to be "Wit and Wisdom of George W.". Wind gone from sails ... becalmed in the Sea of Stupidity ... abandon all hope ...

PS: You're still a brainless piece of knobcheese.

Dear aussie boy,

Who ever wrote the poor imitation of Belvedere's response does have a point, you sometimes treat Belvedere shabbily. The question that remains to be answered is how are you going to treat Belvedere in the future?

Dear Norm

Do I stick my nose into your shabby relationship with that damned cat of yours? No!

But since you ask, I intend to treat Belvedere in the manner to which he is accustomed: cruelly. He likes it that way. He was bred to suffer and serve. Such is the way in our marvellous British Empire (now sadly reduced, but the Queen is still a very lovely lady).

You damnable Yankees could never understand, so please don't bother to try.

Yours faithfully
aussie boy, esq.

Dear aussie boy,

My kitty cat has developed a raging case of explosive diarrhea. She is purring quite loudly now. See, kitty cat loves you!

*Sings Barney theme song*

MMMmmm, knobcheese......

Dear PvT staff,

[snipped rambling about cats, dogs, and butts.]

Dear PvT staff,

What!? WHAT?...what did I say this time? You guys are picking on me. I am going to tell my mommy. You don't edit aussie boy when infers he wants to have sex with his grandma at a nude backgammon tournament! Geez...

Norm, I think you mean "implies" I want to have sex with my Grandma. And frankly, we both resent that. Nudity is the natural state of the backgammon player, and it has nothing to do with sex. Indeed, we are Anglicans, so sex is strictly horizontal, usually very chastely carried out through the fly of one's pyjama trousers, and certainly never perpetrated on one's grandmother.

I'm hardly surprised you were edited, given the parlous state of your mind. Wash your synapses out with soap, young man!

Dear aussie boy,

That's right, you don't make muffins for your grandma, you make Belvedere do it. My mistake, what was I thinking!?

Funny how
Tis true Tis true
the mind devolves
amidst gelatinous goo

Perversions aplenty
and myself not exempt
Yet what Joy! What Rapture!
My goatee is unkempt.

My girlfriend snores, she is asleep,
Although I seek to rouse her;
For 'tis my wish that she should grasp
The woody in my trouser!

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Thanks for that insightful comment! It makes interesting reading, especially when I need a payday loan.

Thanks for that insightful comment! It makes interesting reading, especially when I need a payday loan .

Thanks for that insightful comment! It makes interesting reading, especially when I need a payday loan .